[HanCinema's Film Review] "With or Without You"

Several decades ago Maggi lost both of her sons to unforeseen incidents, leaving behind only three daughters. In traditional Confucian culture this is a big deal- children and especially sons are supposed to care for you in old age. So Maggi dealt with this problem by buying Chunhee, a mentally deficient woman, to serve as her husband's temporary concubine. Now, in the present day, long after Maggi's husband has died, "With or Without You" chronicles the irony of their continued living arrangement.

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Really, the whole situation is so ironic, on so many levels, that "With or Without You" is a difficult concept to explain outside of cultural context. Remember what I mentioned about the importance of sons in traditional Confucian culture? Well, modern Korean is not traditional Korea- while we see Chunhee's biological children, it's clear that they're all living their own lives in the new world, leaving Maggi and Chunhee mostly out navigating old age on their own. In that sense the surrogacy arrangement was a waste of time- Maggi was expecting a filial son at all times, not just on special occasions.

But the slack is taken up, bizarrely enough, by Chunhee, who in practical terms works as Maggi's servant. Chunhee accepts verbal abuse and performs chores that at times seem degrading. Yet Chunhee seems happy and at times I had to wonder- would Chunhee really have been that better off if her womb hadn't been paid for? The life and career opportunities of a woman with Chunhee's mental faculties aren't good. While Chunhee doesn't have much here, she could certainly have a lot less.

Essentially, don't be fooled by the basic description. "With or Without You" may be a documentary about an unusual living arrangement, but it is by no means fluffy story about unconventionality. Maggi and Chunhee are distinguished mainly by how conventional their lives are, just from a different angle. It's just that a traditional lifestyle is a great deal more flexible than a lot of us have been led to believe. Maggi doesn't follow these rules because she arbitrarily admires the rules. Maggi's goal is practical. She wants to live until she can finally die.

"With or Without You" is in that respect a film in the proud tradition of South Korea's elderly generation- Maggi is a woman who's stubborn and mean because she'd old and that's how people act when they're old. I rather doubt Maggi was any more friendly when she was a younger person. Even so, there is at any rate something admirable about a woman who seems so genuinely indifferent to other people's opinions.

Beyond that though "With or Without You" really is just exactly what it looks like- a weird novelty of a story that's being told because it's a weird novelty. I can strongly recommend it to anyone who's curious what traditional Korean culture actually looks like- there's a simple realness to Maggi and Chunhee's situation that defies stereotypes even as it appears to embody them. Beyond that it's just a public interest story about Korean old people in the countryside. The material is interesting to be sure, but a tad culturally specific for a mainstream audience.

This review was written by William Schwartz as a part of HanCinema's EIDF (EBS International Documentary Film Festival) coverage.

"With or Without You" is directed by Park Hyuckjee